


Valentine's day

by thoughtsandtealeaves



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Gift, Valentine's Day, akumadeshitsumon, ask blog bonus content, request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-28 09:07:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17784557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thoughtsandtealeaves/pseuds/thoughtsandtealeaves
Summary: This is a very loose interpretation of historic reality, in which earl Phantomhive commercialises Valentine's day, and a certain demon reflects on the process behind the day's renewed popularity.





	Valentine's day

**Valentine's day**

If there was anything remarkable about humans, it was the fact that they could find any excuse to turn a seemingly meaningless thing into a huge spectacle. Sebastian had always been impressed by this extraordinarily human pastime, but never more so than during his servitude to his current master. The young lord Phantomhive had a nose for business, that much had been clear from the start. Sebastian had been skeptical at first, but over time he had grudgingly come to admit that the child really knew how to turn a profit. In as little as three years, Funtom company had been transformed from a relatively minor company into a large and thriving enterprise. It would have been impressive for an adult human being, let alone a child.

The young master's methods were quite ingenious and modern. By targeting specific groups in his marketing campaigns the young lord always managed to draw in new customers, and by offering seasonal specials he ensured that these customers would come back. Thanks to these tactics the company's products sold like hot buns on a cold day. The latest marketing scheme was the most outlandish of all so far, and to Sebastian's mild surprise it had worked much better than even his master had anticipated.

The campaign was centered around the Catholic saint known to the general public as 'Valentine', who had been a symbol of courtly love since medieval times. Sebastian was only too aware of this connection, having been around when it was first established, but even in those days he was sure the man had never been as popular as he was in the United Kingdom right now.

The young master had found out about the saint during a lesson some time in November, and even before the start of the new year he had formulated a plan to make a profit off this piece of human history. Sebastian had not taken the plans very seriously, but soon came to realise that it was likely to become the young master's greatest scheme so far.

Shortly before Christmas, a new play became the talk of the town in London. The play was about the life of Saint Valentine, who had apparently been blessed with an unnaturally long lifespan, considering the fact that the man himself had most likely been born in the third century A.D. and the play was set in the middle ages. This historical inaccuracy notwithstanding, the play told a tragic story of love and loss, of betrayal and the power of love that triumphed over all. Above all, the play demonstrated how saint Valentine had been able to keep the love of his life by presenting her with the most precious gift of all - a rare and precious delicacy from faraway lands that he had gone to explore. It was quite a piece of work, and most people would have found it hard to believe that the basic premise of it had been cooked up by a thirteen-year-old with a business opportunity in mind.

Sebastian had been politely skeptical before the play went out, but to his surprise the British public seemed to love it. The play was the talk of the town in London, and saint Valentine himself gained an uncommon level of popularity among the women of high society. February 14th was already known as a day for lovers, but this renewed interest in the tradition elevated it to new heights. Funtom company's new Valentine's day confectionery sold out in a matter of days, and the mail orders came in such great numbers that the factories all had to run overtime in order to fulfill them. Furthermore, tables for Funtom Café's Valentine's day high tea had been fully booked several weeks in advance. It was rumoured that some members of high society were going to attend, and the young master had therefore decided to tighten security for the event.

Which was how Sebastian came to find himself arranging plates of nauseatingly sweet cakes and bite-sized cucumber sandwiches on a silver tray in the kitchen of Funtom Café. The young master had instructed him to keep an eye on the proceedings and to discreetly take care of any trouble that might arise, but he had not forewarned his butler about the uniform choices for this special event. Sebastian did not think the pink waistcoat suited him at all. He was even less enthusiastic about the apron with the big red hearts and the embroidered letter 'V' on the pocket, but there was little he could do about it. The young master had ordered him to be here, so this was where he had to be.

Sebastian picked up the tray and conjured up a smile, then headed into the lavishly decorated café. The entire space had been made over in pink and red hues from floor to ceiling. A lace pattern adorned the windows, forming intricate hearts with the letter 'V' at the center. In a corner of the room a string quartet was playing simpering romantic tunes which might cause a headache even in the most taciturn person on earth - a headache that would not be improved by the frankly unacceptable shade of pink of the tablecloths.

There was an overwhelming amount of chatter, mostly from emanating from excited women whose husbands looked as though they would rather be anywhere else but here right now. Sebastian sympathised with them a great deal. He too would rather be doing almost anything else - mucking out a three-hundred year old well seemed like a pleasant idea, or perhaps wrestling a family of bears off his master's property. But no. He was stuck in this place until closing time, which seemed further off than it had ever seemed before.

It was unbelievably busy all afternoon, and Sebastian did not get a single break. He hardly had time to marvel at the marketing genius of his master until almost six at night, the time when the cafe would close for the day. His final task was to count the money that had been made that day and see it safely to the bank. As he counted the money and added up the cheques, Sebastian's eyebrows shot up towards his hairline. The amount they had earned that day could have fed a small army for week or two, and it would certainly please his master to see that his scheme had worked beyond anyone's wildest dreams.

A few words, a few images, a few days' work, and suddenly an old tradition had been reborn, earning Funtom company it's biggest profit since the company was founded. Sebastian could not help but marvel at the genius of it all. Loathe as he was to acknowledge his master's brilliance, even he had to admit that this particular plan could not have turned out any better. It was all thanks to the gullibility of humans, and their desire to believe in whatever stories they were told. It was truly remarkable how easy it was to make them believe in something.

Sebastian smirked. It always pleased him to see humans dance around like puppets on strings, even if the strings were in someone else's hands. It was not rare to see a human willing to manipulate others, but to see it done so skillfully, so subtly that the humans in question didn't realise they were being had was quite the art, and the young master had all but perfected it. It was an admirable feat.

Still, Sebastian was going to make his master pay for the pink waistcoat. However much he respected his master's talents, certain standards had to be upheld. And perhaps it would be good to remind the young Earl that there was still at least one being left in this world who would not bend to his every wish.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! If you enjoyed this work and would like to read more of my Sebastian, please come over to my askblog (akumadeshitsumon) on tumblr. 
> 
> Also, chibimyumi over on tumblr drew amazing art of her interpretation of Sebastian's apron in this fanfic. Go check it out here: https://chibimyumi.tumblr.com/post/182812655884/a-relatively-quick-doodle-of-sebastian-in


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